Make America Laugh Again: Hoke and Spare Change: How to run for Congress for $100

That's a vintage Palm Beach voting booth.
It was used in the historic election of 2000.

At the recent Trump rally in Jacksonville, I was asked by several people why I got into the race to represent the folks who live in Florida’s 4^thCongressional District. As a write-in candidate with no party affiliation, I am, admittedly, a long shot. So, why did I get into this race?

On April Fools’ Day, The Florida Times-Union used a letter to the editor by me in which I announced that I would run for President. Most of that letter was from a schtick I put together years ago when I was in comedy. It was Pat Paulsen-ish. Here’s an excerpt.
“Many Americans have lost their sense of humor. We no longer laugh as we once did. Candidates have been getting meaner and the jokes have been getting uglier. However, we can Make America Laugh Again. Not with insults to belittle one another, but with kinder gentler jokes. I envision an America with a thousand points of laughter, all over this great land of ours. This laugh is your laugh, this laugh is my laugh. Life, liberty, and laughter - these are the values that will bring our country back together. Ask not what your country can do to make you laugh. Ask what you can do to make a fellow American laugh. Give me laughter, or give me death!”
Two weeks later, when Congressman Crenshaw announced he was retiring, I looked into what it would actually take to get into the race for that seat. I discovered that it’s so easy a caveman could do it. Even a caveman with very limited resources.
This is the craziest election I can remember. The two candidates for President, Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, are truly terrible. American voters are accustomed to choosing between the lesser of two evils. This year, determining which it is promises to be quite challenging. That being the case, I felt that becoming a candidate would provide me with a good platform from which to provide running commentary. Plus, I came up with a slogan that seemed perfect for this election season. “Make America laugh again.”
When I found out that it wasn’t prohibitively expensive to officially become a candidate, I decided to see how far I could go on a budget of $100, totally out of my own pocket. If elected, I won’t owe anybody anything. Getting the paperwork notarized and sending it off to Tallahassee by certified mail cost about twenty dollars. I spent another fifteen dollars on the hat and another twenty dollars on business cards. That leaves $45.00. So far, so good!
Even though I'm a bit of a long-shot, the idea of a steady gig that pays well ($170,000 plus solid benefits) is appealing. Also, it seems like the work would be interesting.